LOUDBRAIN

Christmas Present, Christmas Coal

The Knicks do something right.

The Bengals do something wrong.

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A Gentle Reminder

Planning to take the subway? Good for you. Mass transit benefits us all. Keep in mind, however, that admission to New York's underground transit system requires a MetroCard for access. Oh, you already have one, you say? Again, good for you. It's helpful to remember that you should have your MetroCard within easy access before you approach the turnstile, especially if you're traveling at busy times, say, morning and evening rush hours.

Otherwise, you will stand at the turnstile, loaded with your shopping bags and your puffy coat with the wonky zipper, and you will search EVERY POCKET for your MetroCard while denying access to the platform and the approaching train several hundred people, all of whom REALIZED THEY WERE TAKING SUBWAY AND ALREADY HAVE THEIR METROCARDS IN HAND.

This reminder also applies to use of New York's many buses. You may find it helpful, during your twenty five minute wait in the pouring rain, to use that time to search your person for the MetroCard so that it is ready to swipe through the card reader as soon as you step onto the bus. DO NOT WAIT UNTIL YOU ARE ON THE BUS TO SEARCH FOR YOUR METROCARD.

Oh, and that cell phone that you have? You may want to practice walking and talking before joining the pedestrian stream on one of New York's many streets. That pedestrian stream has places to go, people to see, trains to catch, and it does not appreciate that YOU CANNOT SEEM TO TALK ON YOUR CELL AND WALK FASTER THAN THE AVERAGE SNAIL.

Showing your friends the many sights New York has to offer? Tourism is great for the economy. Thank you. Please be aware that many of New York's sidewalks are narrow and fraught with impediments such as fire hydrants, news stands, overflowing trash cans, homeless people, and illogically placed signage, and that really, all of us will appreciate it if you and your friends/aged parents/cousins/johns DO NOT WALK FOUR ABREAST in front of us.

And, to answer your questions:

This park, as the sign says, is Bryant Park. Central Park is uptown several blocks, and is much, much larger.

No, I do not have a quarter.

No, they are not made from actual dogs. The sausage, however, is authentic 'track rabbit'.

Yes, anywhere on 42nd Street west of 8th.

Um. No. Ewww. But thanks for the offer.
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Today Miami, Tomorrow The World

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Stan Van Gundy and Pat Riley at the press conference announcing Stan's resignation and Riley's return to the coaching spot he once forsook in favor of Stan.

Lemme ask you this, reader:

Does Stan look like he wants to do this? Is that the face of a man who wants to spend time with his family, just when Shaq will return from IR, and Ron Artest is being shopped by the Pacers?

And check out Riley's expression; the stiff necked downward glance, checking to see that the good soldier is still in lockstep, still muttering "Ja, Mein Fürher."
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Funny, You Don't Look Fluish

My throat is scratchy, tender, and sore, and my body aches. It started middle of last week, and I was utterly useless last Thursday. Some of this I attribute to playing Scrooge: keeping my legs slightly bent, my feet splayed, and my hips thrust catawampus, and using most of my vocal range for 'mean scrooge' and 'doubtful scrooge' and 'redeemed scrooge', but my voice was always well supported and my pre-show warm up and post-show hot showers took care of most muscle/skeletal issues...

No, I just have a damn bug, that's all. Makes me very tired and reluctant to swallow, but vitamins, liquids, and drugs ought to knock it out in a week or so.

Today is also my Dad's 78th birthday. Happy Birthday, Pop!
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Travel Day

As I write this, the entire Eastern Seaboard is being coated with a semi-liquid white substance, up to 8 inches in some places. This started while we Easterners slept, at around 4:30 a.m.

I need to make a journey to Staten Island, there to perform the role of Scrooge. The trip usually takes 2 hours by my preferred method, a dazzling public transportation combo of light rail, subway, ferry, bus, and shoe leather. The performance is just about 11 hours from now, and I figure to leave the house at noon....which should put me at the theatre steps in time for half-hour.

The snow is pretty, though,and most sane persons will be taking the day off. Which means, I guess, that I'll be on said public transportation with the crazy ones.

Not so different from the usual routine.
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Cleaning Up

Bear with us. We're still moving old posts over to this new location. Mostly going well, though we seem to have lost a few entries from last summer. Or maybe I didn't write anything then (Highly Likely...) In any case, I can't continue with this because I'm due at rehearsal.
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No Promises

Sure, this may look like a recent post, but I'm not about to guarantee that I'll be adding to this mess on anywhere near a regular basis. Promises have been made on these pages before...promises that were broken. Shattered. Torn into tiny bits.

I will say that I miss my ladies, who are away visiting family, while I remain behind to rehearse.

And I'm happy to see that the Clippers are having a very decent early season. The Knicks, of course, are not. This is probably not Larry Brown's fault any more than it is Stephon Marbury's fault. Let's blame Isiah.
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Taking A Swim In Lake Douglas

Where have I been? Oh, please..its not like I update this very often anyway. So, yes, I've been lying low, and I plan to do more.

Summer only comes around once a year, no matter the hemisphere (and discounting the tropics), so gather ye rosebuds. Or something.

I'm certain you can get along without me for a few more days weeks.
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Stat Of The Night

Former Knicks on the rosters for the NBA Championship Series: 2
Current Knicks on the rosters for the NBA Championship Series: 0
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Doctor I've Got This Pain...

Doctor, I've Got This Pain...
Okay, the vote was 6-3, with O'Connor writing for the dissenters, but still

“Our national medical system relies on proven scientific research, not popular opinion. To date, science and research have not determined that smoking marijuana is safe or effective,” John Walters, director of National Drug Control Policy, said Monday.

Oh. Lung cancer, emphysema, cirrhosis, blindness, et al...all determined by “science and research” to be side-effects of indulgence in perfectly legal products, those are okay. But pain numbing, slight euphoria, and the munchies...no can do.

Hippie.

To quote Dickens: The law is a ass.
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Intelimac

As I type this, Steve Jobs is announcing that Apple will switch processors from IBM PPC to Intel Pentium starting June, 2006. 2 years ago, Jobs had promised a 3ghz Mac , but IBM was unable to pull it off, so he dropped the hammer.
The whole Interweb has been abuzz over the weekend about this announcement, so it comes as no surprise. What is surprising is that every version of Mac OS X has been compiled for Intel processors in the super secret Apple labs.  Every version in the last 5 years, and it has been running on Pentium processors in Cupertino since around 2002. Although there had been rumors that OS 10.3 would run on Pentium, it had never been confirmed, or really, given much credence. 
I wonder what the penalty would've been had anybody leaked and confirmed that information, say, two years ago? That engineer probably would've vanished off the face of the Earth...
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What's Been Done This Week

• We've torn out the carpet in the living room and the dining room, exposing the 100+ year old hardwood floors. The floors are in surprisingly good shape for their age, if in need of polishing and waxing, though the dining room has rather more nicks and bumps than the living room.
• Planted the herb garden, phase 3 of the new landscaping in the back yard.
• Replaced the very old, very delicate, very inoperable windows in the bedrooms and bathroom on the third floor with look-alike custom jobs.
• Still to come: Sprucing up the front porch. Staining the deck. Paint, paint, and more paint.
• Bonus: The irises are in full force, with the peonies looking to open in the next few days. Ditto the azaleas and rhododendrons.
Um. I seem to be a suburbanite.....
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Wall Of Hair

Phil Spector, Misunderstood Record Producer.
Hair Bear, Misunderstood Recording Artist.
wallofhair-tm
I have never seen them together in the same room. Or cage, for that matter.
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A Fine Institution

My heartiest, heartfelt, hearty heart heart congratulations go out to my friends Mark and Al, who have announced their engagement(s). They're marrying separate women, so they say.  Miki and Jamie, congrats to you two, too.
I should add that I haven't clapped eyes on either of these guys in at least four years, yet through the magic of email and blogs, I can ignore them just as surely as if I were still on the set or riding shotgun in a Penske.
My sister's nephew Todd is getting married, too, but I see him every six months.
Back slapping all around.
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Jackson Browne Wins MVP!

capt.pna10105082233.nash_nba_mvp_pna101-tm
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New Toys On The Horizon

Most of you who know me know that I'm a Mac user. I'm not a mac bigot, necessarily; I've used both PC's and Macs, though from my perspective, the Mac has a superior operating system. And it just got superior-er, with the release of Mac OS version 10.4 'Tiger'. This afternoon, I ordered a new ibook, tricked out to max disk size and ram, with a 'superdrive' DVD burner. Why the ibook?  My current model, a 500 mhz G3 'icebook', has done yeoman work, but it has a comparatively tiny hard drive (my ipod has a larger drive...), no burner, and is starting to experience wacky screen problem.
I looked long and hard at the Powerbooks, and almost caved on the 12“ model cause its so damn cool looking... but that screen, same resolution as my ibook, seems much, much smaller to me. (I'm getting a 14” ibook. Yes, same resolution, but larger pixels for my no longer perfect eyesight) And, I was concerned about wifi reception. Jo has a 15“ Powerbook, and her reception is great if she's sitting right next to the Airport in the den, but pretty crappy when we're in the office, which is across the hall. My desk is 2 feet closer to the door, but still, I'm leery. Tiger is pre-loaded on the new machine, and of course, all the 'ilife' apps. (I was never able to run iDVD and Garageband on this one.)
So now the waiting game begins. It should ship tonight or tomorrow. I've spent money, so naturally, I'm sick about it.
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Fur Ball

Wil Wheaton has had an amazing professional life this year: he's a successful writer and columnist, he's had his return to prime time TV with a guest shot on CSI, and the improv troupe he's a part of is kickin' butt in L.A. He's had a bad run of luck on the pet side of things though. One of his cats, Felix, died of kidney failure in February, and just the other day, his Maine Coon cat Sketch had a heart attack and died while Wil was away on business.

About 5 months after I started seeing Jo, Julian, one of her cats, crawled to the base of the front porch, mysteriously injured, and not long after that died in her arms. We think he may have been glanced by a passing car, but there wasn't severe trauma or indeed, much blood at all. He was by far the most outdoorsy of the cats, showing up to eat and get him some lovin', but spending most of his time chasing squirrels or beating down field mice. And although I didn't know him all that well, it fell to me to give him his burial. Mind you, this was mid-late December, and the ground didn't give easily to the spade, but bury him we did; he rests near the back fence next to another family cat, Junior.

We survived with the three remaining kitties: Rocky and Sophie, who are litter mates, and Binx, who was Julian's brother. Binx is the alpha cat, endlessly patient with the others (famously rescued Rocky from his precarious perch in a tree once), and marvelously vocal when petted. He has sort of a high pitched stuck-muffler sound, completely endearing and quite soothing.

About a year ago, we all traipsed off to the Cat Show at a local hotel and cooed over the many balls of fur in both the Pure-Bred and Domestic rooms, and not long after that, Jo and I visited the Clifton Animal shelter. There we were chosen by a tiny, pawsy striped guy who'd been abandoned in a supermarket parking lot, and who the shelter had named, coincidentally, Binx. A week later (after the necessary visit to the vet), we brought him home and christened him Twidge.

He's been mostly an indoor cat, but lately we've been unable to restrain him when the other cats go out. Binx has taken charge of the little guy, following him and keeping him in line as he explores the wonder that is 'outside'.

I get a wee tense when Twidge is off on his jaunts. There are dangers out there: dogs and raccoons and the neighborhood bully cat and, of course, cars. But I'm heartened that Binx is keeping an eye out, and I'd like to imagine that maybe Julian, Junior, Felix and Sketch are, too.


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Home Owner Science

It is a Scientific Fact that carefully wrapped cables, extension cords, and strands of Christmas lights tangle themselves over a period of time. How much time is relative to when such cables, cords, and strands will be needed again, so if you happen by the storage area on Tuesday and notice that all the items are neatly arranged, said items will be hopelessly tangled when you go to use them on Wednesday. Why this happens has been the subject of many many studies over the years, and really, the best the Scientific Community can do is say “We Don't Know”. I believe that the converse must be true as well, thus I'm conducting an experiment of my own.

Having finally taken down the Christmas lights, I tossed them haphazardly into a plastic storage tub. Again, I did not wrap them at all, I did not ensure that the strands were carefully separated, not touching in any way. I just tossed 'em.

I will see this tub many times over the next several months, and each time I do, the strands will be snarled together like the residents of a snake pit. BUT: In early December, on the day we decide to put them up again, I expect to find them neatly arranged, not twisted or tangled or jumbled, carefully laid out just so.

If not, Science has a lot of 'splainin to do.
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Why Fred Bassett?

When I was a kid, we had a Bassett Hound named Molly. She was an agreeable dog, generally, though like all hounds, she tended to vocalize too much. But she was endearing just the same, droopy ears and slobbery jowls included, loyal, kind...with the exception of the time that she snapped at the neighbor girl's face...and she lived a long life, and I think, a good one.
I read the newspaper every day, and part of that ritual is the comics. The 'funny' pages usually aren't so funny, but it's cumbersome to call them the 'occasionally lightly amusing' pages. Included in this 2 page spread is a strip called '
Fred Bassett'. I have had ol' Fred delivered to me for years, in different cities, in different papers, and my question is: Why? Why Fred Bassett? There are certainly several moronic  “comic” strips, to be sure, but Fred Bassett isn't one of them. Fred Bassett is dull. Supremely dull. Majestically dull, even. I have never cracked a smile at Fred Bassett. Fred Bassett resembles no Bassett Hound that I know, now or in the past. And Fred's insipid owners, with their bird watching and tea sets and walking sticks and stupid caps are even duller than Fred Bassett himself.
How did this come to be? Who at the syndicate is responsible for this, and who at all of those papers finds Fred Bassett amusing, or gods forbid, funny?  Beetle Bailey, on his worst day, is Jim Carrey compared to Fred Bassett. Just stop with the Fred Bassett already. And take Funky Winkerbean with you.
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The New Front Walk

This was going to be a post about the new front walk, just completed. It replaces what was a dangerous, crumbling eyesore. The guys did a terrific job. Beautiful stone, solid underfoot, with a nice semi-circle at the front steps. And the side path, equally crumbly, has been replaced with bluestone pavers. Yes, things are shaping up.
march2305-tm
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Vince, Jason, and The Veal...Live!

Chet the intern answered the phone the other day, and accepted an offer on my behalf from my buddy Mark, who had come up with Nets tickets. Mark didn't have to ask me, but he'd run out of options, and I'm more than happy to be the guy who gets to go when others are locked into unbreakable commitments. Okay, it was the Nets, who aren't having the best season but are still in the hunt. And true, it was against the Jazz, who are in a free fall without Carlos Boozer. But the seats? Sweet, as you can see from the grainy pix. (Actually, maybe you can't see...but they were great seats.) And NJ won, which makes the trek to the Swamp easier. Not that I drove, mind you. And speaking of the swamp, included with the tickets was VIP Parking, so we didn't have to hoof it from Section ZZ, Row W, Slot 691.
courtside2-tm courtside1-tm

Trust me... the seats were really, really good.

I'd never seen Vince Carter live. When he's cooking, you can't stop him. He made Brian Scalabrine look like Scottie Pippen a couple of times. And Jason Kidd was on the verge of a triple-double when he sat down, Actually, both he and Carter rode the bench for the last quarter, leaving clean up to the likes of Zoran Planinic, who had a nice game, and Cliff Robinson, who seemed lost.
Thanks Mark!

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Kurt Thomas Is Still Standing In Blue & Orange

Maybe Isiah is still thinking about this one. He didn't trade Kurt, again, and that's to his credit. But the Knicks are gonna miss Nazr. He was having a great season, and I don't think Bruno, as the remaining big man, is quite up to stepping in.
Looking forward to having Malik on the squad, and Mo Taylor, too. And unloading Vin Baker was the right thing to do....but a true center is still needed, there are one too many forwards, and I'm having a hard time getting past Steph's middling production.
George Shinn is a class act: He trades Rodney Rogers to the Sixers this afternoon, then flies Rodney to NY on the private jet so Rogers can play against the Knicks tonight. (Well, either classy or
really in a hurry to get rid of the guy.)
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Happy Few Days Into The New Year

Given my spotty posting history, it's unlikely that there will be much more to see here than there was in '04. I'm back in Boston for a few weeks, and I'll use the excuse that I don't have ready access to a broadband connection. (That's a sham, though...This city is crawling with wi-fi hotspots, and the private home where I'm staying also has a cable modem, but that service is down at the moment. This post is coming to you from Starbucks next door to Old City Hall on the Freedom Trail)
I'm flabbergasted that the Jets beat the Chargers, and I have mixed feelings about it: On the Jets side of it, I'm glad they came through with a solid game and got to shut up the NY tabloids for a few days. The flip side is that the Bolts had to lose. The Chargers, I should note here, were a childhood favorite of mine (because of the cool powder blue unis and that simple lighting bolt helmet), and I tend to be a sucker for comeback stories. The turnaround this year was remarkable, and San Diego looked like they had a chance to keep it going deep into the playoffs. The Jets were supposed to be in the playoffs, and frustrated all of us by not being a better team along the way.
Since I'm a Boston resident for a while, I'm rooting for the Pats to get back to the Super Bowl. I don't know what this town would do if they actually win the thing again...two major sports championships in the same year? Who do they think they are, Los Angeles?
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